Wednesday, July 23, 2008


I was reading a book that I could not remember if I had read before, I'd obviously seen the movie...So I went to the library one day and picked it up. Memoirs of a Geisha. Took me a week to finish, as I just did earlier this evening. I can say I 1) do remember reading it 2) was teary at a few points. The struggle with life.

The struggle of the loss of family, becoming a slave/maid if you will, no control of day to day roles....The struggle of surviving in a time of turmoil....To find happiness that was said to be unattainable.

I was finally actually reading into the words of the author of the womans life. As I was actively reading, I could relate in some way. Just as every girl can struggling to come out in a world that is controlled by men and the thoughts of what a "proper" woman should do/ act. The loss of family member to a disease. Growing up unknowing of my own destiny, thinking that I have found it. Then it is gone. Or hold on to somethings that just need to be let go of. Wishing to send messages to someone, like throwing flowers into the river hoping that person may see them and pick a petal up out of the water.

With all of the bumps in life. The ups and downs. The tears and joy. Right now I may be in a hole per se. I have felt very low since returning to dreary Eeeerie (as some call it), as well as some bad luck. With people, mutiple cars, and money.

I feel true to this quote lately(slightly edited)..."life has been like a stream that falls over rocky cliffs before it can reach the ocean..."..."whatever our struggles and triumphs, however we may suffer them, all too soon they bleed in into a wash, just like watery in on paper."

Tuesday, July 22, 2008



This is laguna beach. It was so beautiful, and nice surfer guys :-D
took a picture of the sign here because with my phone i couldn't take a picture of the actual signs, still pretty sweet to be in hollywood. where i did meet a star :-D

Monday, July 21, 2008

My Fantastical Day

So today in my great life went to my physical therapy appointment due to my car accident, pretty much just got a really good neck message....Then on my Journey out to school, in the middle of no where....So walked down to get Tim Hortin's coffee (which is way to hot and need an extra cup covering it), then waiting for the bus... Yes lovely Erie Public Transit System.

There are always such interesting people on the bus....To go out to school which is in the next town over it has to go all the way through the city downtown and then back up through the city to go out again. There was an interesting character whom decided to talk to the bus driver the entire time, rambling... Only Erie's "finest" ride on here it seems like. THEN the bus driver believes that I am someone I'm not and keeps trying to communicate with saying he remembers me. I take the bus like once a year....Asks me if I have children, UGH no!!! i'm sitting there just trying to read my book in peace for this HOUR LONG bus ride to school....

I make it to school and did not have to do much work in my another hour ride home (by the way by car it takes 15 mins) on the way home even more characters

A woman who used to come in to subway and annoy us all and be very needy for no specific reason. WOuld need something every few minutes. Well she struggles to get on because she has an electric basket wheel chair, mind you she has no problems walking. took her 5 minutes to get it on the bus then 4 more to try and tie it up. The driver had to wait, then every minute she got up and put her large a@# in my face while wearing a matching ugly green sweat fix her NOT MOVING chair....

I also believe that most people who ride the bus feel that showering is just an option....People it is not an option it is a MUST everyday not once every few weeks.

End and out for now.....

Sunday, July 20, 2008


It has been too long....Feel like for sometime I have lost my mind...Running through thoughts, events, getting my bearings back....Took a airbag in the face to remember everything I'm working towards.

You work hard for something that you want and it feels very awesome when you earn the grades or reward that you struggled hard to obtain. Through all the stress of the books, lack of sleep/fun, wanting it all to be over, almost giving up...The last few feet that seem to drag. Well are rewarding....

Lately working is my main passion I guess you could say. Attempting three jobs (when I have a car) Bartending (LOVE IT) Sandwhich making (slavery) and reseach.

when to California for an AMAZING two weeks (pictures still to come), First day right off of my lovely 1st class flight was taken to the ocean :) gorgeous!!! Spent everyday with my cousin who also was getting married. Everyday was beautiful, 90 degrees, no humidity.... Went to Laguna Beach, Newport Beach. Hollywood :-D even Saw a TV star. I did not want to come home back to the United States (haha) It was like I left the country, only to come back to a dark home.... was a cloudy dark day....went down to the dock sat there for a while thinking about everything that occured out in "never never land" my mind stayed back there with my heart it seems....Home....everything knocked me down...lost a few things, somme for the good some for the bad... Its always how you come out of things...lately i've been taken it pretty calm, unlike the waters i've been swimming in lately.

So where did this summer go? Lost it with my mind wandering, now was back on track.. Studying to take my GREs working in my lab and at the bar and other places. Found a great car...soooo for my topic I've sent you through SO CAl and now....

Went with my glass, car accident, down for a second and everything is up in smoke...more damage to me then to the car...damn airbags...2nd degree burns these things are made to save you... when I got more hurt from them then without....Just recently had a conversation about how they are dangerous then few weeks later I get to defend it...

SO CAL, oh how much I miss you!!!